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Best Zombie Apocalypse Plan

author
Bob Roberts
• Monday, 18 January, 2021
• 12 min read

It is largely dependent on where you are when the zombie apocalypse begins, who you’re with and/or rendezvousing with, and what you’ve done to prepare for that moment. For those of you new to the inter-web, Google Maps is your friend…and possible savior, when planning your zombie escape route(s).

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(Source: www.sott.net)

Contents

Title your map Zombie Escape Plan and enter any information you may need to reference in the Description area. Mark your escape route with Place marks for any points of note or importance as you go (i.e. water sources, population numbers, natural borders and fortification, vegetation, and wildlife).

Taking advantage of natural water sources along the way will give you the opportunity to replenish your supply (fresh water only), and given a real knowledge of the local vegetation, the opportunity to stock up on any edible plant life. Because zombies don’t need to breath, they will keep coming…and depending on the water depth, pile and climb on top of each other until their goal has been met.

This will increase your chance of survival, especially if you can find an isolated area to drop anchor, only coming ashore for supplies when absolutely necessary. Natural borders are great, as long as they don’t compromise your ability to leave that area (in case of attack or the need for supplies).

A decent alternative to Costco, for example, would be a private warehouse. Of course, you’ll have to do your research to find a warehouse that would actually be beneficial to you and your survival. Just make sure that your supplies allow for long periods of time between restocking if you’re planning a sea voyage.

Taking risks WILL lead to your demise, not to mention putting the rest of your party in harm’s way. Becoming physically familiar with your escape plan will not only take a source of anxiety out of the equation, but depending on weather and other possibly chaotic conditions and influences, help to get you out safely and in a timely manner (because it WILL BE a time-sensitive situation).

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(Source: yourdarkhour.deviantart.com)

Note: Familiarizing yourself with the means to hunt, fish, trap, as well as how to grow your own food, will ensure your survival and help sustain you when the zombie apocalypse is upon us. All the men (and most women) I know have one thing in common: They have a zombie contingency plan.

If the zombies arise tomorrow, everybody has at least a hazy outline of what, exactly, they would do to survive the coming onslaught. It's the single best part about the zombie mythos: planning your strategy.

So I asked everybody I could think of to submit their own zombie contingency plans, and this is but a small sample of what I received: By Robert Brock way My zombie contingency plan : I live in the inner city, so I'm pretty well fucked.

Apart from having warm, tough, weatherproof hides aplenty, they also have complete hunting/survival materials and several items that could make great melee weapons, from old decorative lumber jacking gear to a giant stuffed moose head (come on, what it lacks in practicality it more than makes up for in style). They have the keys on premises, and all vehicles have very few windows, but a lot of storage space for supplies.

They get fair gas mileage, are unlikely to break down and can handle rugged conditions. I would load up on guns, ammo and hunting/outdoor supplies, then grab a Post Office truck and take those same back roads out east where civilization thins out a bit.

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A small pharmacy, a feed market and a grocery store are all you need now that you're supplied with gear and out of the city. There are plenty of those around, so I wouldn't waste time grabbing anything in a danger zone as hot as the city.

Even a roadside gas station has first aid kits, batteries, flashlights and packaged food. I would pick my way back to Central Oregon around the Indian reservations where there is fertile ground and high, flat plateaus in the middle of otherwise even plains.

High ground to defend, structures already built, out of the way, and you can see anybody coming from literally miles away. In the winter it gets cold enough to freeze, but no blizzards or white-out conditions exist.

When the zombies appear and start messing with everything, I'm going to rely on you to have planned everything related to our survival. I'll steal a pair of Wheelies to wear, so I can glide away when I need to make a speedy exit, but I'll still have good traction when running.

I'm also going to pack up our nice sheets because I'm sure you never thought about what linens we would be sleeping on while we're on the run. Well, I work out everyday so that I can be faster than a slowly moving shuffle.

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(Source: theplaidzebra.com)

I also try to hang out with at least one person who is slower than me (obese or elderly) so that when the zombies attack I can leave them to be eaten. I have no doubt she will not only survive the apocalypse intact, but quite possibly will do so in a silver rhinestone tank top, and eventually end up running a methane fueled trading post with a mentally handicapped giant and a little person.

Destroy the steps to my front porch, and barricade the first floor windows of my house. Wait for the shit to hit the fan, get as many friends and loved ones over to safety.

After the mass panic has resided a bit, mainly due to more people being infected and dying, scavenge as many supplies as possible. I live in a large fraternity house, so staying put may not be such a bad idea.

If the outlook for the house is bleak, attempt to clear out and move in to one of the large freshman dorms that were fallout shelters during the Cold War. Start a small farming operation on the roof of the building, or the court yard of the house, depending on the location.

If still alive, attempt to lower the zombie population--i.e. kill the fuck out of them--and look for survivors. Basically using my access to multiple arms and my connections with the chief of police, I would hunker down in the armory with my guns and crack.

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(Source: www.pinterest.com)

Pros: Another plan that relies heavily on feeding old people to the undead. It is nice to see that practicality is taking front seat here, with such concerns as “love” or “morality” in the back.

Much like feeding wild animals, you have taught the zombies to rely on your location to provide free food. The difference here being that when you show up without food for the pigeons, their revolt does little but soil your suit, whereas if you show up empty-handed to a zombie feeding, you end up being that which they soil their suits with.

Once all these factors are determined, THEN and only then may you proceed, because if you just run out of your house waving a machete in hopes that you'll make it, you'll be deader than Liam Neeson's wife. Sadly enough this usually means leaving your parents and siblings behind unless they have some sort of useful skill.

It's a good idea to bring a wide range of skilled persons with you. You may still have some shred of humanity left in you that makes you want to save that child, but he's just going to slow you down.

Unless you plan on eating canned cranberry sauce for years and beating the infected away with rocks, chances are you're going to need some supplies. The smart zombie survivor already has at least a bladed weapon and a bit of food at the ready, but it won't last you very long.

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After your team is together you should head towards a large department store such as Super Target, Walmart or Costco but be sure to scope it out first. Now the common tactic for zombie safety is to find a military base or a heavily fortified area nearby.

With the amount of people who will turn infected you'll quickly find yourself overrun by the horde. The safest option is to steal a puddle jumper aircraft (or befriend someone who can fly a plane) and get to either Hawaii or Alaska.

Being disconnected from the mainland, there is a good chance that the infection hasn't spread that far, and if it HAS then with a smaller population to deal with it will be easier to hold back the horde. Like Three Dog says “Never forget the importance of periodic weapon maintenance; rifle, pistol, police baton, I don't care which.

Pros: Comprehensive, complete and largely lacking in any of that pesky mercy or distracting human sentiment. Cons: Largely lacking in human sentiment means you are unlikely to “befriend” anybody, much less a puddle jumper pilot, who will, regardless, have nowhere near enough fuel to get to Hawaii.

The plan is essentially this: When the zombie outbreak finally does occur, my cousins are going to hijack the ferry used to shuttle cars from the mainland to the island. Myself, and any other unsullied survivors will swim out to the ferry, where we will begin the trip back to the island where we will make our stand.

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(Source: appadvice.com)

Sadly, or perhaps fortunately, I have discussed this plan in great length with my cousins. Pros: The ferry transport is a great idea for an organized evacuation.

Lobster men are notoriously unreliable folk, unless you're referring to the new roster of the Crash Test Dummies. The slow zombie is a bit more in-depth: Walk (briskly) to a mountainous area that's hard to climb.

Also, it might be preferable to go to a mountain in Alaska as the cold temperatures added to their already low body temps could turn them to corpse-sicles Pros: Multiple plans for multiple scenarios. In which case, you're most likely there precisely because of the fear of something like a zombie apocalypse, and so probably also have your stores, weapons and hermit-like persona at the ready.

If your ice machine isn't big enough, then proceed to blow the fuck out of any zombies that try to get in, then use their rotting bodies as a natural barricade; the smell will be annoying at first, but not as annoying as being eaten alive by your dead grandmother). NOTE: If no one is reachable by phone, then hook a music playing device to the overhead speakers and blast some heavy ass death metal, because not only is it fun to kill things while listening to death metal, it's also a great way for passersby of an un-zombified nature to know that there are other non-zombies occupying the structure.

Pros: It's always good to know a drunken, mentally unstable ammunition maker. Your plan, from the corpse-barricade to the simple aside that it is “always fun to kill things while listening to death metal,” terrifies me.

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(Source: www.youtube.com)

Cons: Grocery stores use display windows as basic marketing tools. The front of nearly every grocery store, regardless of size, is made up of large glass planes to show off the merchandise.

Authors note: I am writing this from a fully and completely realistic point of view, I add none of the frivolous magical properties of a ghoul or zombie, and disregard the illogical completely. The Zombie Survival Guide by Max Brooks, takes the first part of the book explaining the virus “Solarium,” and I am going to work off of that idea, using the same name.

All other concepts are completely scientifically based, and we will explore the possibility that a virus such as Solarium exists in nature and that it has the ability to infect a hosts brain cells (neurons), first by entering the circulatory system via bodily fluid interaction of an infected individual and an uninfected individual, and finally making its way to the neuronal cells and manipulating said cells. Skip this if you don't give a fuck about biology: In order to realistically write a zombie contingency plan, one must have knowledge of how a zombie functions in order to exploit their weaknesses and predict their attacks.

I am telling everybody right fucking now, the anatomy of the zombies outlined in Continue Reading Below The zombies would disintegrate, with cells losing on a scale so grand that there is no way they could eat you/pass on the virus before turning into a pile of mush, let alone have the capacity of movement.

Therefore, I am about to discredit any possibility in the known world for a human body to function without the proper systems in place. A virus is considered “pseudoliving” which means that it is not technically alive by the standards of science.

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Without the host cells machinery, a virus cannot grow or replicate. It needs glucose, fat or protein to begin the aerobic respiration that uses oxygen as a final electron acceptor in the path to making ATP (energy) to run the metabolic processes of the cell.

This means the virus will make the neuronal cells replicate, creating millions of new neurons each with viral DNA in them, each with the ability to control more of the processes of the human brain. One may also imply that the zombie is much smarter than your average human being, with a larger number of neuronal cells capable of propagating larger numbers of signals at a faster speed.

I contest the idea that zombies are stumbling creatures with an off-kilter gate and little hand-eye coordination. I believe that this hypothetical virus would create extremely intelligent humans which it would have full control over, by producing the proteins and enzymes of its own DNA rather than that of the original cell, it would be fully plausible that the human infected with this virus would be controlled by the desires of the virus, which would be to infect new hosts.

Also, the infected individual would not be the same person they were in their lives with everything from memories to basic wants and desires being manipulated and changed by the virus. The zombie would also have a heightened set of sensory systems, and it's plausible that the neural signals from their external body are blocked by the virus in the CNS, reducing and possibly eliminating the effects of pain or touch sensation.

Furthermore, they may act with a hive mentality, working towards a common goal (and remember, they're smart), and their circulatory system may be routed in order to increase the amount of blood to the muscles, increasing their strength and agility. The virus does not necessarily impact their vocal cords, and they would look like a regular human being.

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Their behavior would be notably different, but they could pass the virus on before the realization of what has happened is fully recognized. Contingency Plan With this knowledge in place, we can begin to determine what will and what will not work.

Quarantines will be key in containing the virus to large areas (in the range of regions to complete countries). Given our inability to distinguish the zombies from the humans, large quarantine areas will be key.

A 99.4 percent communicable virus can most likely become airborne, especially since viral particles are pseudoliving and can enter a dormant stage if not active in a cell (such is the case when they are housed within a water molecule, such as on a humid day). Dry climates are the best due to such conditions, especially since a zombie lacks any other desire than to pass on its virus and thus does not drink, dehydration would be a good way to defeat them.

Other ways to kill the zombies via natural causes would be to expose them to harsh environmental conditions, such as the extreme hot or cold, high saline, low/high pH and anoxic environments all fit the bill. Thus, the best areas to flee to would be the deserts, the higher and lower altitudes and the poles.

We would want to see them coming given that a more intelligent being would outsmart us in a terrain war using the mountains or valleys. Saskatchewan, where you can watch your dog run away for three days, is a good place to be for a zombie apocalypse.

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(Source: www.pinterest.com)

We need to get rid of these zombies before they kill us all, and we have to do it in a way that causes the least amount of damage, the least bloodshed (especially into the water systems; I'll say it again, viruses are pseudoliving, they can live in the soil and water forever until it attaches to a host cell whose machinery it can manipulate) and the most successful. The survivors guide is for those that know these fuckers are smarter than us, and would kick our ass in a terrain based war of wit.

Anyways, we can lure the zombies into the valleys and mountains, from there dams can be taken out and landslides created provided we still have control of the army bases (I thank you, Wright brothers). Fire is a good way to kill a virus, since even the pseudoliving cannot deny the destructive powers of heat to proteins which make up their outer coat.

Thus, to the areas where any remaining zombies fled to and eventually died due to extreme environmental conditions, let the forest fires reign. Note: this plan is kind of geared toward North and South America following the quarantine, it can be applied to Europe as well.

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6 wowplus.net - https://wowplus.net/alan-walker-fade-free-mp3-download/
7 wowplus.net - https://wowplus.net/lily-by-alan-walker-k-391-emelie-hollow-free-mp3-download/
8 www.last.fm - https://www.last.fm/pl/music/Alan+Walker/_/Do+It+All+for+You
9 funandfactz4u.com - https://funandfactz4u.com/top-best-songs-of-alan-walker-download/
10 anmolmehta.com - https://anmolmehta.com/meditation-music-mp3-free-download/
11 www.vagalume.com.br - https://www.vagalume.com.br/alan-walker/do-it-all-for-you.html
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